Memorial Day Weekend

So we spent Memorial Day Weekend in Chicago with my parents and my sister Laura came out with her family as well. As usual, time passed by quickly. Lukas got to meet the cousins from the other side of the family. (He has a total of 4- Freeman, Hannah, Timothy, and Phoebe.) Photos will come later, but we got to see Stacy, Ryan, & Eli for lunch at Lou Malnoti's. We got to have dinner at Big Bowl and watched a Angels & Demons with Santiney & Carlos. We actually watched 3 movies in the theatre while we were in Chicago. It was great. Gong-gong & Po-Po baby-sat Lukas while we also saw Star Trek and Wolverine. We saw Wolverine with Sandy and had breakfast with Vicki. We also got to visit Xochitl, Eddie, and their 3 boys. Xochitl's youngest was Andrew and he was about a month older than Lukas, but their due dates were about the same, so they look about the same age. We also got to see our other friend Ryan who worked with us both at KSA, but unfortunately ran out of time to see his 3 boys. So many boys.

This was also Lukas's first plane ride. We were a bit nervous, but he did great. On the flight there, he slept virtually the entire flight and I fed him on the way down. The return wasn't that bad except that we had to sit on the tarmac for about 1.5 hours, so our time on the plane got expanded to 5.5 hours instead of 4. Though he didn't sleep the entire time, it went as well as we could hope. The main difficulty was that he had a poopy diaper and needed a change, but even that wasn't so bad.

The weather was warm for most of our trip. We also got to go downtown briefly for some italian beef and hotdogs, but we didn't get to walk around as much as we wanted to. The day we chose to go downtown was rainy which curtailed our outdoor adventures. Can't wait to go back!

Look Alikes?

So here are some pictures for you to compare. The first of course is Lukas in his car seat. Then, it's me on the sofa and finally, it's a photo of Edwin's dome. So does this change your votes about who Lukas looks like? It looks like a majority of people think that he looks like me or some mixture of the 2 of us. However, not one of you voted that he looked more like Edwin. While Lukas seems to have my eyes, I think that Edwin's photo looks a lot like Lukas to me. (At least the hair- or lack there of!)
Lukas:
Michelle:

Edwin:

Just a Wee Bit Cranky

So this week has been a little tougher with Lukas. He's been crying a bit more during the day. However, the moment we step outside the house, he stops, so I have to figure that he enjoys being outside. Here are some new pics of Lukas on days where he is happier:

Happy Belated Mothers Day!

So this was my first Mother's Day and it was very nice. We started the day off at church where we had an infant dedication for Lukas. Then, we headed into the city and went to the Asian Art Museum which was free for the holiday. Lukas enjoyed the culture by blissfully sleeping in his baby carrier. We had dinner at Suppenküche which is a German restaurant that I have always wanted to try. I still like Berghoff's in Chicago better (too bad it closed down a few years ago), but it was still very tasty.

So here is a video of a class that Lukas and I took a few weeks ago where they tricked me into exercising (I am in the black tank top and Lukas is in the zebra baby carrier sleeping):


So here is the class description that I read: Lullaby Exercises is a series of fun, easy-to-learn movements–dancing, swaying, stretching & relaxing–that are performed while holding a baby in your arms or in a baby carrier. It’s designed for new moms to share moments with their baby, put a little one to sleep, and to feel good emotionally and physically. Doesn't that sound like it's going to be pretty low intensity? This was more like a hip hop class with your baby. It was fun and I will go back, but I just thought it was funny because it was totally not what I was expecting.

Don't forget to vote in my new poll!

Giggles

My days are a blur now. I have a hard time remembering what I did 2 hours before. I never really know what day it is or what the date is. It's a happy time. We heard Lukas laugh for the first time today. Edwin was making faces at him and then all of the sudden, he giggled. He's been smiling for a few weeks now, but today he giggled. Of course after we heard it once, we tried to get him to laugh again. They say that babies change quickly and I never really knew what people meant until now. It's like something new happens every week. One week, he's lifting his head. Another week, he's smiling. He's also gaining more control of his hands. I can tell that he purposefully touches my hand or hits a toy.

People are curious about my days with Lukas. I don't really know what to tell people because it's such an effort to just eat, get dressed, and out the door.

This weekend, we're going to Kai's 2nd birthday party at a park in San Mateo. It's also my first Mother's Day, so we'll see what happens.

3.5 inches in 2 months

That is how much Lukas has grown during his lifetime. I wish that I could grow 3.5 inches in 2 months. I don't know that I ever grew that much that fast. He is now 23 inches and 11 lbs. and 13 oz. Check out photos from the last 4 weeks:

I'm a Horrible Mother!

I don't know of any mom that hasn't felt that way at some point. Being a mom is a tough and thankless job. You don't get paid any money. You have to deal with pee and poop that is not your own all day long. You have a boss that has unpredictable mood swings and is extremely demanding. That's not to say that motherhood doesn't have perks- a feeling that your baby is happy and healthy at the end of the day, that adorable toothless grin, having a dance marathon/karaoke session anytime you want, and nothing beats a hug from baby. It's just that you can never do enough.

I try to plan one activity per day whether it's to go to the pediatrician, go to a class, take Lukas to the park, or run errands. I feel guilty when I am not able to do at least one of those things in a day and I think to myself "I'm a horrible mother!" when I know that's not true. Or when I feel a little selfish and want to watch some TV like Oprah or Desperate Housewives and Lukas is awake. (I try not to watch TV while he is awake unless I am feeding him so he can't watch.) I also feel guilty that I haven't mailed out birth announcements, I am behind on Thank You cards, I haven't taken as many pictures of Lukas as I have wanted, I haven't posted the pictures that I have on the camera, I haven't figured out what to do about childcare, I haven't returned emails/phone calls, I haven't been cooking much, I haven't been reading much on child development, Lukas hasn't had his tummy time, I forget someone's birthday (which I never used to do...) and the list goes on. I can't seem to move fast enough or there aren't enough hours in the day. It's just overwhelming sometimes. Then, I read that I should be napping and resting to make sure that I can produce enough milk. So I feel guilty when I do nap and guilty when I try to get things done. It's a double-edged sword. I guess it's like a marathon (not that I have ever run one!) in that it doesn't matter how you do on each individual mile, but that you finish. Lukas won't remember the days that I didn't take him to the park, I just have to hope he'll just remember the ones that I do.

So Hot!!!

So we're going through a mini heat wave here in the Bay Area. It's been over 80 degrees for the past 3 days. This is not normal for us and our house has no AC. Poor Lukas is like me in that he doesn't like to be hot. Edwin likes the warm weather- maybe because he's from SoCal. However, the basement has been nice and cool, so we have been enjoying our days down there.

The past few weeks have been a blur. Last Friday, we headed down to Santa Cruz for our first road trip with Lukas. We had a great time since Lukas slept both ways. (Like I said, the boy gets his sleeping habits from his mom.) We attended Tyler's first birthday party last weekend. It was Lukas's first party and I guess he was a little nervous because he pooped while Jamie was holding him. Luckily, Jamie is very experienced with poop, so we didn't feel too bad. I think we had a record of 3 complete outfit changes that day. We also had a nice brunch with Show, Derek, and the Schneiders on Sunday to celebrate their engagement. Our cousins had their twins, Justin and Ashley over Easter, so we're going to visit them this weekend.

A lot of people have been asking me how I am coping being at home with Lukas. I think we're doing pretty well. He likes going out, so I like to take him to run errands or go shopping. When we're at home, he tends to sleep more maybe because there is less to interest him. I definitely do not get bored, but I could see how people might get lonely when there is no one to converse with. I consider it a good day if I am able to do the laundry, return phone calls, or run the dishwasher. I find that I have very little time on the internet now or the ability to use the computer is limited since it requires 2 hands to type. I can read more which is nice. I am definitely not looking forward to going back to work, but I still have 2 more months, so I'll try not to think about it. Alright, I gotta run because I think I'm melting and having a warm laptop on my lap is not helping.

Perfection

As a new mom, I consider myself very lucky. Lukas has continued to sleep quite a bit at night and is still gaining weight, so those long stretches of sleep at night are not affecting his growth. He loves to be outside and does not cry very often. We are absolutely spoiled. So another 3 weeks have passed and I have been remiss in posting photos. We have them. They are just still in the camera. Guess I'll have to post those later.

What have we been up to for these past few weeks? We have had a few out-of town visitors. Bro-in-law Alex came 2 weekends in a row for work. Then, Cousin Esther came in for a few days to visit. Priyanka and her family came for a short visit too. In the past, we used to go to nice restaurants for dinner to catch up with Priyanka and Matt. However, parenthood certainly changes things. We now run to the supermarket to find food for the kids, get them in bed, order take-out or cook, and then make breakfast. Activities are a lot more home-based, especially when there are more than 2 children involved. We're still able to go out since Lukas spends most of his time sleeping, but I see that this is how our future will most likely be. It was still a great time, just different.

Ellen also came for a visit last week and it was a really great timing because Edwin's went back to work last week as well, so she helped me ease into taking care of Lukas by myself. Last Monday, it was just me and Lukas. It was pleasant, but I was nervous. It does take longer to do things by myself. Ellen arrived on Tuesday and we had a great time with her baking banana bread, having a semi-impromptu party, and "meandering" around SF on a lazy Friday afternoon.

I now find myself constantly fighting the clock. You remember that game Perfection? You know, the one where you have to put all the puzzle pieces into their respective spots before time is up. That's how I feel. I have to try and fit things in between Lukas's naps. Shower, breakfast, lunch, chores (laundry, dishes, paying bills, etc.), email, return calls, blog, etc. all have to squeeze in and before Lukas wakes. The difference is that I never know when Lukas is going to wake up whereas in the game Perfection, the time you are allowed is constant. I used to sweat and get stressed out by the game, but I find that with Lukas, it just makes me more efficient. I move faster and watch less TV. I try not to stress out if I'm not able to finish what I'm doing and just figure that I'll do it during my next "break."

I have also found that perfection has changed for me. Perfection is now defined as a fun day out with Lukas and Edwin with no poopy explosions, not getting peed on, a 7-hour stretch of sleep, and a toothless smile from Lukas. Lukas has started giving us his social smile which means that he is now smiling because he wants to, not just because he has gas. We haven't really been able to capture it fully on film yet, but it's really priceless.

Not So Fast!

So Lukas will be 3 weeks old tomorrow. I feel like he has changed and grown so much already. He is probably over 8 pounds now. His face is fuller, his ears are bigger, and his hands are bigger. The past 3 weeks have been such a blur. Days run into each other and I never know what day of the week it is much less the actual date. I guess yesterday was St. Patrick's Day. Happy belated!

Here are some photos of Lukas from his first 2 weeks:


Breastfeeding was not easy in the beginning, but I think that it's much easier now. I remember in the beginning that there were times I felt like he was fighting me by waving his arms in front of his face and didn't want to eat anymore. I discovered that there are times he does tell me when he is done eating or when he needs a break. How does he know how to do that only a few days after birth? Amazing. After I started "listening" to him, we did a lot better. I can even watch TV or read a book while I am doing it. Lukas was sleeping really well at night, so I used to hate waking him up to feed him. I am so glad that I went to see a lactation consultant who finally told me that I didn't need to wake him up at night to feed because he was gaining enough weight and feeding well. In the beginning, I would set my alarm to wake myself up to make sure that he was eating, but then he kept sleeping, and I kept thinking it would be crazy to wake a sleeping baby, so I would let him sleep. After a few nights, I stopped setting my alarm and would let him tell me when he wanted to eat. There was one blissful night he slept from 11:30PM until 6AM the next morning. I know we are very lucky and I don't take it for granted. Most nights, I feed him once or twice. Usually, he'll sleep for 4-5 hours straight so I get a nice long rest.

We've had quite a few visitors in the first 3 weeks. My parents were here for 9 days and Edwin's mom was here for a week. We are finally on our own this week. It was nice to have help nearby, but it's also nice to be able to get into your own routine. A lot of people are amazed how mobile we are, but I kind of get stir crazy at home and Lukas seems to like going out as well to see new things so it works for both of us.

As we are getting to know him, here are some of the things we have learned in the past 3 weeks about Lukas so far:

• He likes riding in the car.
• He does not like diaper changes.
• He likes sleeping.
• He does not like being cold.
• He likes being held or being in a sling.

We are also excited because we are going to have some out-of-town visitors soon too- Priyanka's family and Santiney and Carlos. Woo hoo!

Introducing Lukas Anthony Lager

As most of you probably already know or probably have guessed from my lack of posts, our little boy Lukas has finally arrived. There are 2 of you out there who guessed it correctly. It's been a whirlwind experience, but here's how it all started...

On Wednesday morning, I woke up around 7AM and went to the bathroom like I do every morning. I went back to bed and 10 minutes later I noticed that the bed was wet. I'm thinking to myself, "Oh no, not again. Did I just pee on myself again?" Then I remembered that I had just gone to the bathroom, so I probably didn't pee on myself. I called Jeannette, who is an OB, Edwin, and my OB's office. My OB's office told me to call them when my contractions were 5 minutes apart. I stayed at home for most of the day and Edwin came home from work to wait for those contractions. Here were my activities that day after my calls:

1. Had some breakfast.


2. Took a 2 hour nap. (I mean, I should get some rest before the big event, right?)


3. Had some lunch.


4. Watched some TV, emailed, and read. Edwin decided he would clean the house.


5. I called the OB around 4:30PM because I wanted to talk to them before the office closed. They told me that I would need to check into the hospital that night because there would be a risk of infection if I didn't deliver within 24 hours of my water breaking.


6. Went out to dinner with the Banerjees for Korean food.


7. Checked into the hospital at 9PM.

One of the worst parts of the process happened at the beginning as I was getting admitted into labor and delivery. I had to have my blood drawn and an IV inserted in my arm. The nurse that inserted the IV was terrible. She missed my vein which hurt a lot and hit a valve, so there was a gauze pad full of my blood. Then, she had to do it again and I'm thinking to myself, "Do you know what you're doing?"

After checking in, they brought us to the labor and delivery room. The original intent when I arrived at the hospital was for them to give me a drug to start dilation, but when the OB checked me at midnight, I was already 3cm dilated which meant that I didn't need it. At 2AM, they checked me and said that I my contractions weren't strong enough or regular enough, so they wanted to give me pitocin to make them stronger and more regular. They seemed strong enough to me! The contractions were the worst part of the process. Edwin suggested trying to sleep between contractions, but they were so strong that there was no way that I could.

Edwin was pretty sleepy since he spent his day cleaning while I took a nap during the afternoon. I'm also more the night owl than he is because he is more a morning person than me. To focus on something other than the pain from the contractions, I asked Edwin to talk to me. Edwin thought that this meant that I wanted to converse, so he started asking me questions like, "When are your parents arriving?" This was not the type of distraction I was thinking of. I didn't say that I wanted to talk. I just wanted him to talk to me. Then, Edwin had a brilliant idea. I had put together a playlist on my ipod for the labor and delivery. He put the music on and I was able to focus on the words and sing along. They should offer karaoke for women in labor. Just a suggestion.

At 4AM, the nurse asked if I wanted an epidural for the pain since the anesthesiologist was nearby. My original thoughts on a drug free delivery were that I would try and do it without the drugs for as long as I could, but that I was not opposed to an epidural. Several of my friends have had them and I have not heard of anyone having a bad experience with it- though my friend Lei said that her bad experience was that her epidural stopped working. I thought for a minute that I could rough it a little more and then I thought, "Why am I doing this? This hurts a lot. Who knows how long this will take?" So I changed my mind and said, "Yes, I would like an epidural, please." Labor after epidural was VERY nice.

After the epidural, I was able to sleep from 4:30AM to 8:30 AM. This is the closest thing I can think of to sleeping through labor. It was SO nice. The nurses and doctors were still coming in to check on me intermittently throughout the night and I didn't care. Some people say that they don't like epidurals because it doesn't allow the mother to feel how she is pushing. At around 9AM, they told me to start pushing and an hour and a half later, Lukas showed up. Funny thing is, I had a dream when I was 8 months pregnant that I was sleeping and woke up with a baby. Maybe it was a premonition.

The labor and delivery nurses said that they really liked my playlist. Maybe I'll publish it someday to the blog. It was like 5 hours of music, so we'll see. We were listening to Cowboys and Angels from George Michael when Lukas arrived.

Another funny anecdote about one of the labor and delivery nurses who was a nurse in training was that a Jem song started playing and she said that she used to listen to that song when she was studying in high school. I think that Jem became popular only 5 years ago. How old was this nurse? Just a little scary, but the other nurse was clearly more experienced, so it was OK.

I'll definitely be posting more pics of Lukas's first week, but here is the birth announcement that we sent out via email. The time was actually 10:44AM when Lukas was born, but who really cares except us?

False Alarm

So today is my due date and still no baby. The OB says that there is no dilation and we are scheduled to induce on Monday at 6PM which means that if baby does not come out on his own this week, he's going to come out next week. Thanks to everyone's well wishes. I can't believe people even remember what the due date is. I have trouble remembering myself!

I had a false alarm yesterday. I was meeting Matilde for lunch at her place. While I was waiting for her to open the gate, I felt a slight contraction and then warm liquid running down my leg. As Matilde approached, I told her that "Either my water has broken or I have just peed in my pants. Neither of which is good." I have experienced a little leakage before when I sneezed or laughed, but it was nothing like this. I called Jeannette to ask her and she told me that if I continued to leak, then it was my water. If not, then it was probably the contraction which also caused my bladder to contract which caused me to pee. Turns out it was just urine. Matilde jokes that she doesn't think that I even had a contraction and just said that I did so that I didn't have to say that I peed on myself for no reason.

So this past weekend, Edwin helped the Banerjees move into their new house while I watched Maika and Kai. After the move, everyone came over and had pizza at our house. That's when Show finally announced the news that she and Derek got engaged- though that's not entirely true. She didn't announce it, but that's when she finally showed us her ring. She had been hiding it all day and hadn't told any of us about it even though they got engaged last Monday. We were all super excited for them. We'll have to wait to hear Derek's side of how he proposed. Congrats you guys!

No baby yet!

So I went to the OB today and she tells me that baby is not coming out yet (no dilation.) She's not working this weekend and we are slated to help out the Banerjees this weekend with their move, so in terms of scheduling, I've told the baby that Friday, Monday, or Tuesday would be best for mom and dad. Depending on how long it takes him to come out, late Sunday night would not be a bad option either. Since we're getting down to the wire, I have put a poll on the blog to see when you all seem to think that he will be coming. Polls close next week because my OB says that she wants to talk about inducing if he doesn't come out within a week. The doctor is hoping that he comes soon because she thinks he's getting big- like he's in the 7 lb range and hopes he doesn't wait until he's 8 to come out. Mom hopes that he is not an 8 pounder either. Then I'll be able to say that I gave birth to a butterball. Small is good, but healthy is best. I told Edwin that people were expecting him to post the news, so maybe you will see a posting from the elusive blogger.

Year in Review

While I know that I have not been the best at posting this past year, I realized today that I have been even worse at keeping up with other people's blogs and updates. In the past, I would typically take a lunch hour about once a month to catch up on other people's blogs to see how my friends were doing. I realized that I probably haven't done that in a while because when I started looking at my friends' blogs today I noticed that many times, I was reading back to posts that were dated in early 2008. Yikes.

I found out that there were friends who were also pregnant and those who are thinking of moving. What was very amusing to me was the number of people that also apologized for not posting as often as they used to. I thought it was just me. You get busy and forget to document the things that you meant to. There are times I think to myself, "Surely, no one reads my blog anymore" only to be reminded of those handful of loyal readers who are somehow amused by my blathering. Or maybe there are more out there like me who decide one day out of the blue to "catch up with Michelle and Edwin" and read about what we have been doing for the past few months and are able to forgive us when we haven't posted anything for several weeks.

I wonder if the baby will leave me any time at all to post or check email. We'll see..

Happy Presidents Day!

Yesterday, we got a welcome day off. I know, I know. Everyday is now a day off for me. There are actually a lot of things to do during the day for someone who isn't working. I used to wonder what Edwin would do while he was home during the year of Edwin. I still wake up in the mornings- mostly because I either have to drop Edwin off at the BART or we have construction workers coming in to work on the basement. Here is my typical day. I eat my breakfast- usually cereal like Golden Grahams or toast with peanut butter or jelly. On the weekends, Edwin makes me bacon, eggs, and toast. Then, I'll shower or make some phone calls (not fun phone calls to friends, but companies on the East Coast) or calls to state disability, the OB, some pediatrician, or some childcare facility. I might clean up the house a little, check my email, or do a little prenatal yoga and then I'll start preparing myself some lunch or meet a friend for lunch. I have a few friends who work in Alameda and Matilde is still on her maternity leave, so I might meet up with her. After lunch, I'll typically run errands like buying groceries, going to the post office, returning stuff to stores, or some baby-related thing like go to the OB, send out Thank You notes, or setup something in the baby's room. By the time 5PM rolls around, I'm usually ready for an afternoon nap because it starts to get dark. If I have the energy, I'll make a dinner. If not, I'll take a nap before I pick Edwin up from the BART. We'll have dinner together, watch a little TV, and then go to bed. Time passes by quickly. I always have my To Do list. I keep trying to get things done without straining myself too much, but there's always so much to do. This is me without a baby. What happens when there is a baby and nothing gets done? At least Edwin will be home for the first 6 weeks.

So we had a pretty relaxing Presidents Day weekend. I already told you what we did for Valentines Day. Sunday, we spent most of the day cleaning and doing stuff around the house. On Monday, we hung out with the Schneiders and Banerjees (again!) We'll be seeing the Banerjees again this weekend if the baby hasn't arrived. Edwin is going to help them move to their new house in Orinda (yay!) while I help watch the kids. After that, we're hoping that the baby comes relatively soon. Seriously, the countdown has started! T minus 8 days! I think that I'll be ready then...

Happy Valentines Day!

So we had a pretty low key Valentines Day. We went to a wine bar and to go see a movie in our local theatre. The movie we saw was Taken which was entertaining. We thought that it wouldn't be too busy and showed up too late to get decent seats, so we decided to trade in our tickets for the later show. That's how we ended up at the wine bar next door. I thought it was kind of funny to be 9 months pregnant and in the front window of this wine bar. We have some pictures- don't worry, all I had was some fancy grape juice!

I also thought this video was kind of funny:

Maternity Leave

So I started my maternity leave this week. The week has gone by fast! Unfortunately, I started the week sick. I think I had either food poisoning or some kind of stomach flu. I thought that I would escape this pregnancy without vomitting once, but I was wrong. 3 times. And then when I thought I was finished, diahrrea was next. Given that we are about to have a baby, I guess I better get used to bodily fluids. Needless to say, I spent most of my Monday in bed except to go see my doctor and attend an informational pediatrician session.

Tuesday I got my haircut and had a breastfeeding class. On Wednesday, I went shopping for food and Target and then cooked. It takes a while to prepare food. I'm so used to just getting home from work and heating up food. I forget how long it can take to prep everything. I made steamed fish with ginger and green onions, napa cabbage soup with tofu and wood ear mushrooms, and rice. Actually, I cut and prepped everything and then ran out of energy, so Edwin did the actual cooking when he got home. On Thursday, I cooked some more. I made jook (Chinese porridge) with the leftover rice by adding chicken and century egg. Made phone calls and took a break. Then, I started cooking lunch which was pasta and Prego added with a seafood medley, red pepper, and squash. (I have no idea how Priyanka's hubby Matt does his gourmet dishes. I take short cuts like jarred sauce and pasta from a box and it still takes forever. I am in awe because he makes the sauce and pasta out of fresh ingredients himself.) Maybe one day I'll be that inspired. In the meantime, I'll stick to my shortcuts.

Everyday, I start with my list of To Do's and it doesn't seem like I get to half the things on my list! How would I get this stuff done if I didn't have maternity leave?

Baby Shower

Matilde and Jeannette threw us a baby shower yesterday. We had a great time. There were kids everywhere. The weather was beautiful so we were able to hang out outside on Jon and Jeannette's deck and backyard. There was a monkey theme since we'll be decorating the nursery in green, brown, and white. Guests were asked to design onesies for our little one and we never knew how talented and creative our friends are. Here are some pictures from the event. Thanks guys!

This past week was also my last week at work. They threw me a small baby shower at work as well which was very nice. I still have a few things to wrap up, but for the most part, I am done. People keep asking me what I'm going to do for the next 3 weeks since I'm not due until the 24th. However, I feel like I have a ton to do. My whole Monday is pretty busy. I have a nutritional counseling class that my OB recommended, an OB appointment, 3 pediatrician interviews, and I need to file for my state disability. I'll probably be out of the house from 9-7. Tuesday, I have a haircut appointment and a breastfeeding class. The things that I want to have done first are finding the pediatrician and figuring out what to do about childcare. I'll be setting up appointments on Tuesday for the rest of the week. It was really hard to make time to interview pediatricians and visit childcare providers while I was working since they are available only during business hours.

Here are some more pictures of me at 36 weeks. I keep thinking that if I upload the pictures in the smallest size I can, I won't look so big...you can compare it to what I looked like at 26 weeks in my posting on December 18.

Irritable and Tired

5 weeks to go until baby arrives. 7 more days of working. It's a constant countdown now. We've started attending classes like infant care and childbirth preparation, we're going to see movies in the theatre like Gran Turino, we're researching childcare and pediatricians, and taking hospital tours. You could say that we have ramped up our baby preparation efforts.

It is getting tougher to get around and sleep is sometimes good and sometimes bad. That makes me a little more irritable and tired. I think that it's either to prepare for some future sleepless nights or to get me to start feeling like I would like to have this baby come out. I can see why the home stretch can be agonizing for some pregnant women. I've been pretty lucky. I haven't had bad morning sickness or gestational diabetes, so if this is the worst it gets, it's not too bad. Mostly uncomfortable.

This week was rather historic with the inaugeration of Barack Obama. I've never really been interested in politics. I'm still not that interested, but I did vote for Obama because he seemed different than most politicians and I think he will be an inspirational leader. I have voted in past elections, but this is the first time that I watched the inaugeration. There seems to be excitement and hope with this new president that I have never seen before. I like that he promotes volunteerism and change. I also like that he seems to garner a respect from other countries that we have not had in a long time. Most other presidents I would feel embarassed that we chose them because they seem to perpetuate the stupid American persona. Though Obama flubbed his oath, I think that it is interesting that people seem more forgiving of his blunders. If Bush had flubbed his oath, people would have made fun of him and thought "how typical." For some reason, Obama's temporary memory lapse makes him seem more endearing and human. Even those that did not vote for him have to admit that he does seem eager to make changes, that he is able to motivate people, and inspires hope for country that is in need of it.

After New Year's, there was a shooting at the BART station near our house. The BART police shot a man that was on the floor with his hands behind his back. (He was in some kind of altercation and was trying to calm his friend when he was shot.) I dropped off Edwin at the station the next morning without even knowing about it. We saw TV cameras there, but didn't know why they were there. A few days later, there were riots in Oakland. There were also peaceful protests, but the riots I think are more a result of the economic times and for people who want an excuse to justify violence. With this new leader, I hope that it ends that negativity and helps people to move in a more positive and constructive manner with their restless energy. For too long, I think that the people of this country have been irritable and tired.

Get What You Really Wanted

After Christmas, I saw so many stores advertising this slogan "Get What You Really Wanted." That statement just hit me the wrong way. It implies that you shouldn't be happy with what you have. There are so many people out there that are having financial difficulties or are just depressed over things that are happening in the world. It's such a negative message when people just don't need it. I saw this slogan while I was shopping (I don't remember the store) then I got an email from ebay, and then I think that I saw it on some ad. I'm in advertising and it pisses me off.

I think people have a hard enough time just being satisfied or thankful for the things that they have. As I get closer to becoming a mother, this is something that I hope to teach my children. Believe me, I am not the best example. I know I am always striving for more and better, but I would like to think that I am getting better at being happy with my current situation. It helps that I have a baby on the way and that I am going to stop working in 3 weeks. So what do I really want? Stuff that money can't buy- an easy delivery and a happy, healthy baby.

I am now 33 weeks pregnant. Baby is kicking me everyday (right now!) after I eat and when I am getting ready to sleep. I think that my pregnancy has been pretty easy for me until the last 2 weeks or so. I'm starting to have some really weird aches and pains. For some reason, my right thumb is swollen and sometimes gives me a shooting pain. I have heard of swollen feet, but just my right thumb? No other fingers, just the thumb. Weird. I've also started having more trouble sleeping. Anyone who knows me well is that I am always able to sleep- anywhere, anytime. Since my first trimester, I've been waking up once a night to go to the bathroom. It never really bothered me before and I would just go back to sleep no problem. But in the last few weeks, it's been harder for me to fall back asleep. I don't really know why. Then, on New Year's Eve, I got sick. Not vomitting sick, but we went over to Michelle and Mike's and when we arrived, I just felt sick to my stomach. A few people thought I might be delivering the baby that night, but I didn't think so. I spent most of the night sleeping in their guest bed and I woke up at 11:45PM to ring in the new year. I recovered over the next few days, but I can't explain why I got sick. I would normally blame food, but Edwin ate the same thing I did that day, so I blame it on the pregnancy.

We have started getting ready for the baby. Edwin painted the trim in the baby's room. We removed the bed and cleaned the room. Do we have a crib? Not yet, but we have been researching cribs, pack and plays, and car seats. Of the 3, the only thing I think we have to get soon is a car seat. I'm told that we can't take the baby home from the hospital without one. We have a ton of baby clothes from friends who have had baby boys and from Freeman, Edwin's nephew who is now 6 months old. We have diapers. We're starting to take our baby classes next week. We still have 7 weeks, right?