Throwing out the Books

Lukas has been such a great sleeper since he was born which I say he got from me. I used to feed him, change him, play with him, and put him to sleep about every 2 hours from 10AM to about midnight. Then, at midnight, he would sleep pretty soundly until around 5 or 6AM which people would say was good. Then I started reading more books which say that he needs more sleep like he should be sleeping 3-4 hour stretches in the afternoons and then like 10-12 hours a night. (We're not worried about him gaining weight or needing to eat since he's 14lb and 5 oz as of last Thursday and 24.5 inches long which puts him in the 75th percentile for weight and height.) I was happy thinking that he was getting enough sleep and I was getting enough sleep. Now I have ruined it all by trying to make him sleep more. He never used to cry when I put him to sleep, but for the past few days, that's all he does when I try to get him to sleep. He just doesn't want to sleep that much. His naps have been getting shorter and shorter so he only naps during the day for 30 minutes to an hour. I know I just need to surrender and let him be. That's how it was with the breastfeeding. There were times when I felt like he was telling me that he didn't need to eat anymore and that he would fight me, but when I started listening to him and didn't force him to eat, it all got a lot easier. (All the books said that I needed to feed him both breasts, but I have a good milk supply, so he only needs one side.) I now know that he's a big boy, so I don't have to worry about him not eating enough anyway.

It's been a struggle this week. I used to rock him to sleep and everyone says that's bad because he needs to learn to sleep on his own. Sometimes he does sleep on his own, but sometimes I think that he still needs help. The one thing that I have done is that he is able to sleep throughout the night without eating. He's been going down around 10 and then waking up around 5 or 6AM to eat. I almost fed him last night at 2:30AM, but I decided to just give him his pacifier (for an hour!) and suck it up. (Ha ha! Pun intended.) He slept through the night without eating just fine. I don't want him to start waking up in the middle of the night and expecting to eat so that it becomes a habit. As a result, we took a morning nap from 8:30-11:30AM. Don't ask me what I'm going to do when I go back to work.

I know that he needs sleep, so I'm going to focus on getting him to sleep more, but these books don't seem to be helping me on the how to get him to sleep more. The crying method doesn't seem to work. That just leaves him so exhausted that he falls asleep after crying for hours. He just gets all worked up and then can't calm himself. If I can rock him to sleep in half an hour, that seems faster to me and then neither one of us is upset. He'll learn to go to sleep on his own some day. I don't expect a 3.5 month old to be able to do that yet. All the kid wants to do is eat, sleep, and play. Sometimes, he'll fall asleep himself if he's just swaddled and given a pacifier, but that doesn't always work, so when it does I should be thankful. If it doesn't, I'm just going to rock my baby to sleep. It's like that lullaby- "If that mockingbird won't sing, mama's gonna buy herself a diamond ring..." Well, maybe those aren't the exact lyrics, but I like them better that way!